Wokmania, St Werburghs church, Derby, DE1 1BU

Well I must confess, I have been to Wokmania before, but it was in Sheffield when I recently repatriated no.1 son back to university.
So it was no surprise that my visit to Derbys imposing branch of Wokmania, was once again to be with no.1
Walking into the dimly lit interior of the old St Werburghs church felt surreal and dramatic to say the least. It was immediately apparent why the opening of this branch was delayed almost a year, the logistics and cost must have given somebody a few sleepless nights.

We were promptly shown to our seats and the layout of the food was clearly explained, starters, mains and a section for desserts were all well defined.
How anyone can be expected to even dent the alleged selection of 120 different courses was beyond me, especially as the offer included dry congealed rice, cheap parts of chicken (i.e. wings and legs), dry meatless ribs, oily curries and dry breads. Many dishes weren't even labelled, so we never did find out what they were.
The desserts looked like they were straight from school dinners at Markeaton junior. Jelly, soft whipped ice cream, sponge cakes, copious amounts of slightly bruised apples and wait for it……bowls of Dolly Mixtures! My god, do they do kids face painting aswell? I’ll have Lion-O! (the Thundercats, remember?)
I started to wonder who would actually come here. I knew you certainly wouldn’t want to bring your new lady here on a date (unless you didn’t want to see her again of course), my mother certainly wouldn’t and couldn’t eat this much and £12.90 is in my opinion too much for students. It began to dawn on me that there were quite a few people in here who liked to eat a ‘lot’ of food, so that’s who’s gracing the doors of Derby’s latest eat-as-much-as-you-can venue! This isn’t for me and is a million miles away from decent grub. Vast amounts of poor quality food, non existent and non required service, but a dramatic venue. I predicted last year that Goji wouldn’t last and I’m going to stick my neck out and say that in this day and age, when consumers are more concerned about the quality and provenance of the food they put inside their bodies, there just wont be a place for the Wokamnias of this world, especially at £13 a pop!
Pizza Express: freshly made pizza, plus a starter for £13…….. it’s a no brainer!

Food: 2/10
Service: self service
Venue: 7/10

Tel: 01332 331155
www.wokmania.co.uk (it hasn’t been updated for nearly a year!)

Derbyshire Food & Drink Awards

The food and drink businesses successfully short-listed for this years prestigious award, have finally been revealed.
Derbyshire County Council have announced which eateries have successfully made it on to the shortlist of each of the seven categories for this year’s Derbyshire Food and Drink Awards.
The county council-run awards, now in their seventh year, are held to celebrate locally produced top quality food and drink and reward the county’s finest producers and businesses.

To view the shortlist go to:

www.derbyshirefoodfestival.co.uk/awards.htm

Watch this space.....
Martin

Limes restaurant, 102 Friargate, Derby, DE1 1EX

Limes wasn’t what I’d imagined when I agreed to have a midweek catch up with a friend, but I’m never one to miss an opportunity especially as head chef Ian Boden is firmly establishing himself as one of the regions top talents and has recently reached the final of the prestigious Knorr National Chef of the Year competition.
After a well earned cold beer was taken in the downstairs bar, we headed up the stairs to Hepburns restaurant. It was good to see that even on a Wednesday night there were a few tables in.
We nibbled away at some hand made bread rolls, spreading the soft butter on thicker than I ever would at home, ah well.
Momentum was maintained with the arrival of an appetiser, fennel velouté with tapenade and truffle oil was an exquisite opener which certainly woke and amused our taste buds.
For starters I chose the Langoustine & crab trifle with crab cake, poached pineapple and fennel & pernod sorbet. An contemporary plate that compartmentalised each element of the dish injecting an element of fun into this well thought out starter.

My only criticism would be that my ‘trifle’ was a bit too much jelly and not enough fish, the sorbet and crab cake were a joy. My friend Andrew went for the free range chicken and foie gras roulade with quail egg and truffle salad. A chunky slice of terrine veined with vibrant green brassica, accompanied by a perfectly cooked quail egg and a dressed pea shoot salad. We were both suitably impressed and ensured we sampled each others before they disappeared down the hatch.
For mains I paid the £5 supplement and had the roasted fillet and pressed blade of Derbyshire beef with braised carrot and a cabernet sauvignon vinegar and bay leaf sauce. It appears that one of Ians signatures is to serve beef in two ways (I had that at Christmas). Meltingly tender fillet with a carrot cooked in orange juice certainly gave my palette something to think about. Top drawer in every respect. Andrew chose the slow cooked cod with roasted fennel, black olive tapenade and saffron aioli, garnished with pea shoots. Ian seems to be getting carried away with the pea shoots and fennel this week. The slow cooked cod was delicate and its shape was held by the thin sleeve of prosciutto. We were once again captivated.
Quality rather than quantity ensured there was room for dessert and there was only one place to go, the assiette of Hepburn desserts to share. A polished granite platter with a mix of delicately prepared sweet morsels: A cone of rich chocolate torte, banana and mandarin sorbets a dainty slice of fine plum tart and a miniature version of the classic ice cream sandwich (my least favourite) were chased around the plate by our competing spoons until everything had vanished. It was a fine end to an worthy meal.
I was gutted that the lighting was to dark for my covert camera action, but I need say no more than this is certainly up there, competing as Derby’s no 1.
2 courses £24.95 and 3 courses £29.95 was certainly well worth every penny. Probably not your midweek ‘decentgrub’, but definitely the place to take the missus for your anniversary next month. Go on, she's worth it...........she'll be more than pleasantly surprised.

Limes source as much local and free range produce as possible and support local farmers.

Food 8.5/10
Service 8.5/10
Venue 8/10

www.limesbar.com

Tel: 01332 613665

Three Horseshoes, Breedon on the Hill, DE73 8AN

I’ve tried most, but in my opinion one of the best hangover cures at the weekend is a Sunday lunch, a couple of drinks and then hit the sofa, for a James Bond repeat and some zzzzz’s.....
So with my two partners in crime from the previous night Ann & Kim, we glide off towards Breedon on the Hill near Melbourne, to get stuck-in.
This former farriers building has been lovingly converted to a contemporary pub whilst retaining its ‘old world charm’, with an eclectic mix of tables, chairs and trinkets. The marraige between real ale and dinning pub, is spot on.

Pedigree, Pimms and a plate of bread and olives were called upon, in attempt to dismantle the remnants of our hangovers. No suprise that rather too much of the finger-lickin garlic bread was consumed prior to the arrival of mains. I fall for that one every time!
Pork with customary apple sauce and sage & onion stuffing for Ann (£12.50), roast leg of lamb with pease pudding for Kate (£12.50), breast of chicken with rosemary, barley & garlic pour moi (£16.95), all accompanied by a selection of veg, including carrots with broad beans, red cabbage, cauliflower cheese and a pile of roasties.

My chicken was moist and the combination of barley, herbs and garlic in a light gravy worked well, even though I considered it a wintery combination. Kates lamb dinner was shrouded with a blanket of rich dark gravy, it was a good job she was a fan. Her pease pudding was a bit salty, but a pleasant change to the expected rosemary or mint sauce. The presentation however was careless and her plate looked a bit 'school dinner'.

Ann troughed her way through her generous amount of pork and accompaniments, small grunts between mouthfulls gave an impression of contentment. The four oval dishes of crisp vegetables were faultless and it was great to be served broad beans, I forgot how much I've missed them.
Suitable service was maintained throughout and despite my eyelids starting to shut-up-shop, we couldn't resist a dessert. It was the handmade chocolates for Ann (£4.99), six hand made chocolate truffles including lemon & coffee. Like many, I always ignore the coffee flavour chocolates in the box of Christmas Milk Tray, but I was taken aback by the subtle sweet cappuccino flavoured truffle. Kates bread & butter pudding (£5.49) was comforting and approprately wobbly but lacked the sugary crust I prefer, due to its blast in the microwave. Yours truly had the bakewell tart (£5.49), a hadmade slice of fragipane tart, with custard. A Derbyshire classic, but a bit on the dry side.
The alcohol and food made us all drowsy as the blood desserted our brains and glided off towards our stomachs.......
It was an enjoyable lunch, but provenance asside, £90 including a bottle of wine was a bit stiff, especially £17 for my chicken dish, you can get a 3 course Sunday lunch at Masa for just £18. A bit more attention to presentation could certainly add value to their prices. Nonetheless if you're feelingh flush and fancy a drive out, then the Three Horseshoes is definately worth a look.
The sofa beckons, I wonder if it will be "Octopussy" or "Live and Let Die".........

Food 6.5/10

Service 7.5/10

Venue 8/10

Tel: 01332 695129
www.thehorseshoes.com

Victoria hotel, Dovecote Lane, Beeston, NG9 1JG

After over 2 months of fanying about, I decided it was time to get my ass into gear and complete the circuit of Derby districts finest eateries and re-visit some again, en route.
The furthest blip on my radar is currently the Victoria Hotel in Beeston, a bit close to Nottingham I hear some of you saying, but we got there in my motor quicker than you can say "Derby County 3, Nottingham Forest O" (December 2004 - honest).
Tucked amongst a housing estate, next to Beeston train station and with sardine tight parking, the Victoria hotel ticks bundles of boxes. A gem of a real ale pub, that also prides itself on it’s massive selection of blended and single malt whiskies, live music during selected Saturday and Sunday afternoons and reputedly pukka pub food, oh and it’s mobile free..... fan-pub-tastic!
I believe the evenings can be chock-a-block, but this lunchtime we had no problem getting a table in the sun filled main room.
Real ale, cider and a couple of lagers were ordered and within minutes two plates of shared starters arrived. Both vegetarian, to allow all four of us share (my oldest school buddy being one of "them"). The vegetarian pate (£4.95) was basically mashed up blue cheese and extremely strong, but when taken with a bit of melba toast and some of the dressed salad it came down to earth. The second plate, of olives, hoummus and pitta attracted more attention with fingers of freshly grilled pitta to dip and share and some fat, sweet olives to soak up the beers.

For mains my veggie companion had the vegetarian burritos (£7.95). Three flour tortillas filled with a spicy been chilli and topped with melted cheese and sour cream, a crispy fresh salad kept it company. The ladies had scallops with pea risotto (£11.95) and a chicken supreme (£8.95). Three plump scallops wrapped in prosciuto, crowned a zesty lemon and pea risotto, whilst a pan fried breast of chicken came with a timbale of couscous and a diced pepper infused light gravy. The girls played musical plates until they were satisfied they'd tried enough of each others (well that’s part of the fun, isn’t it?).Yours truly had the Keftedes (£8.50), a trio of Greek style lamb meatballs with rice, sour cream and a crisp side salad. I wasn’t sharing mine with anyone!

There was still room in our tanks for a couple of desserts to share. The sticky toffee pudding with custard (£3.95) and apple crumble with custard (£3.95) were both “old school puds”, but I guess that’s what the doctor ordered.
This gaff is definitely worth a trip out. It’s just a shame it’s the other side of the M1 and under the wing of Nottingham.

Visit and enjoy, but take your “Up the Rams “ car sticker out of your car's rear window for the night !!

Oh, and my long standing veggie mate was as pleased as punch. Phew....

Food 8/10
Service 7/10

Venue 9/10

(Beer 9/10) I've added this in for the Vic.

Telephone: 0115 9254049

www.victoriabeeston.co.uk

o-kra, New Zealand Lane, Duffield, Derby, DE56 4BZ

The last time I visited the Lord Scarsdale on New Zealand lane in Duffield it was an old fashioned estate pub, so I was intrigued to see how Duffields latest Indian restaurant offering o-kra, was going to dispel this image.

You enter the building through what feels like a side entrance. The current trend for dramatic restaurant entrances was ignored or overlooked here, however once inside you immediately notice the completely transformed interior. Out with plain walls, bog-standard furniture and a brightly lit interior, in comes plush aubergine sofas, fabric room dividers and mood lighting.
We sank into the large sofa cushions and ordered some drinks as I scanned the restaurant. They had made good use of the space and gone down the “café crème” colour route (various hues of browns and cream), although a bit dated it was modern and cosy. The toilets had been given particular attention with contemporary hand basins, stone tiling and an abundance of mini hand towels. Still the best way to dry your hands in my opinion.

Papadums and pickles were ordered by mother (for some reason papadums aren’t on the menu?) followed by Murg Achari Tikka (£4.95) for me and Fish Malibar (£4.95) for sister. For mains I went for Chicken Tikka Dupiaza (£8.95), mother Roast Lamb Lazeez (£10.95) and sister Chicken Balti (£9.95).

In my experience papadums usually arrive at the table before you have chance to say “chicken tikka masala” so to wait nearly half an hour was frustrating to say the least.
Five or ten minutes later our starters arrived. Considering there was only about a dozen dinners this evening, service was sinfully slow. Mains arrived in due course, but the time from ordering to mains arriving, was now ridiculous.

Without going into every dish in detail I can say that the food was certainly acceptable. Clean, hot plates, well presented starters and a good meat ratio in the main curries. This is a stylish addition to Derby’s curry scene and certainly makes Duffield “curry capital” of north Derby. It’s the slow, dull and un-responsive service where they fall short. The place oozes incompetence at the front of house and at the time of going to press the web site didn’t work either.

Sort it out guys and you’ll have your Duffield and Quarndon jet-set camping out here.

Food 6/10
Service 4/10
Venue 7/10

Tel: 01332 841156

http://www.okra.org.uk/

The Dog Inn, Main Road, Pentrich, DE5 3RE

Despite being 13 miles from Derby, the Dog Inn at Pentrich had been bleeping on my radar for some time. So this Saturday lunch we hit the gas and 20 minutes later we’re just about there. I’d pre-booked and recommend you do to ensure you get a table at this bustling north Derbyshire pub.
A pint of Timothy Taylor for me (luckily I’m not driving today) and a soft drink for my partner, passed the time quite nicely until our table was vacated and prepared.
Being lunch we opted for the two course £10.95 deal, three courses for £12.95 seemed very reasonable but just too much food for midday.
To start my partner had the soup of the day, which was fish. Vibrant red, saffron infused Mediterranean style bouillabaisse that exuded a deep taste of various shell fish. I found it delicious and was more than happy to polish off her leftovers. I had Mull of Kintyre rarebit toasties with apple and grape chutney. In my opinion it was seriously over described miniature cheese-on-toast, but none the less it was an agreeable savoury titbit.
For mains my partner had the Derbyshire pork sausages & mash with apple sauce and red onion gravy (pic 1). An all time pub favourite, executed heartily with a trio of herby pork bangers piled on to a heap of mash and with a moat of onion gravy. Once again it was quantity that beat her. I was not complaining though.
I had the chicken & ham hock puff pie with mushy peas, chunky chips and red wine jus (pic 2). Plentiful chunks of chicken and ham crowned with a top hat of light puff pastry all co-existing with a tarragon infused cream sauce and a swirl of red wine jus. I hit-it as hard as I could, but I couldn’t polish it all off, especially as I had also consumed a stray porky banger from someone else’s plate.

Service was adequate, the young staff ensuring that dinners were not neglected and tables were cleared promptly. In just over an hour we were done and it was time to head back to Derby for a much needed nap, zzzzz….
Hearty, contemporary pub food that’s definitely worth the ride out. Next time hopefully for dinner, so I can have a pop at the desserts. The dog’s b******s !

Food 8/10
Venue 7/10
Service 6.5/10

Tel: 01773 742781

www.thedoginn-pentrich.co.uk

The Bulls Head, Repton, DE65 6GF

I don’t know where I first got the word on the Bulls Head in Repton, but it’s been lingering on my “must go and visit soon” list for some time. The better half wants to go somewhere new for a Sunday lunch. So it’s off down the A38 (again!) in search of some decent grub.
Repton is our very own Etonian village, with a world-wide acclaimed public school dominating this tiny Derbyshire village. It’s no surprise then that there’s an abundance of quality pubs within it’s domain.
I was really impressed the second I walked through the door. Someone had managed to achieve the perfect fusion of restaurant and pub. The eclectic, antique, brik-a-brak interior is well thought out and I “loved it !”
Unfortunately this is where the essence of the Bulls Head started to go down the pan. Poor bar service, a delay with our table, burnt potatoes, disorganised waitresses, missing cutlery, etc, etc. resulted in a complimentary drink being offered.
When the starters appeared they looked as though the taxi had arrived before they were ready to go out. Nice flavours but scruffy, with no bread to accompany my tasty scallop & chorizo salad (£6.95) or Becs chicken liver parfait (£4.95).
The menu was limited and certainly lacked a chicken option. Two meat, two fish and two vegetarian seemed a bit disproportional to me. I had the Staffordshire topside of beef (£7.95) and Bec had the cinnamon roasted ‘Old Spot’ belly pork (£7.95). Burnt potatoes were replaced with fresh ones, which was the right thing to do, but again they were burnt! The beef was overcooked, but Bec said the belly pork was tasty and tender. We decided to go the whole hog and have a go at the desserts. The lemon curd Eton Mess (£4.95) was crunchy & zingy and well presented, but the sticky toffee pudding (£4.95) was heavy and lacking in expected gooey dates.
I just can’t believe they managed to ‘F’ it up so much. There’s obviously been a massive investment on somebody’s part to create such a slick interior, but yet again when push-comes-to-shove, they couldn't deliver. We could have called in on a bad day, but I can’t believe that so many mistakes could be a coincidence.
“Nice place, shame about the boat race” !!

Food 5/10
Service 4/10
Venue 9/10

Tel: 01283 704422

www.thebullsheadrepton.co.uk

Brickmakers Arms, Newton Solney, DE15 0SJ.

I don't know what's suffered most lately, my wallet or waistband? I've eaten out four days in a row and my cooker's starting to wonder if it's done something to upset me?
Today we've stepped over the Derbyshire border a couple of miles south of Willington, to the Brickmakers Arms in Newton Solney. I'd been hearing that this was "the" pub for Decent Grub.

The disproportionaly small bar made a tight holding area for customers waiting to be seated. It was a struggle to get served and I was overlooked a couple of times by the stretched barman. It certainly isn’t somewhere I'd suggest popping into for a pint.
Once seated I perused the menu which was obviously their Sunday lunch menu so it consisted of the usual suspects, roast beef, pork or lamb, scampi or cod and a couple of pies. We settled on the two courses for £10.95 option, three courses at £13.95 being far too much food for a lunch, but seemingly good value.
Bec had the chicken liver pate with Cumberland sauce. Definitely home made, it was smooth & buttery, but as usual the quantity of pate far outweighed the habitual morsel of bread. The superfluous garnish of apple, orange and kiwi, was unneccesary and seemed dated.
I had a punt at the black pudding with bubble & squeak with red wine & onion gravy. Two large discs of pudding, a pan fried potato cake and an ocean of slippery gravy. It was far too much for a starter. As my old man used to say "My eyes are bigger than my belly". He wouldn't say that if he could see my rapidly expanding mid-rif!

The mains were nothing to write home about, roast lamb for Bec and roast beef with Yorkshire pudding for myself. Two plates of slightly over cooked meat, with a large bowl of seasonal veg to share. The highlight was my mountainous Yorkshire, large and crunchy. Just like mother used to make (and still does).
It was a very average Sunday lunch, certainly not worth the drive, but for the locals I'm sure it hits the spot. It was chock-a-block today and almost claustrophobic.
I noted there was nothing in the main course selection for vegetarians.

Food 5/10
Venue 5/10
Service 4/10

Tel: 01283 702330

"Hey little rich boy.Take a good look at me.Why should I let it worry me.I'll never believe your better than me" (Hey Little Rich Boy, Sham 69, 1978)

Goji, Bold Lane, Derby, DE1 3QE

The trend continues for buffet style oriental eateries, with the recent opening of Goji on Bold Lane and the overdue Wokmania in the old St Werburghs church in Derby.
In an attempt to ensure I keep on top of all new openings, I decided it was time to go Goji.
Goji is a rapidly expanding concept with a further 7 branches opening this year alone. Their location in Derby is good news for the Cathedral Quarter in it's bid to rival Westfield and London Road in the food stakes. The fresh and vibrant facia and interior are however the most invigorating thing about Goji. When we visited this evening there were only a handful of tables occupied and it was in need of some "atmosphere".
Me and my partner Bec, duly ordered a drink and had the concept explained to us, £11.95 eat as much as you like including a desert. OK, let's go....
They're in a bit of a catch 22 situation here, not enough customers means a slow turn around in the food. Starters including crispy duck, had dried up under the heat of the over head lights, pancakes had stuck together and salad was looking weary to say the least. The hoisin sauce I used to complete the crispy duck pancakes was watered down.
The mains were better as they benefited from being predominately sauce based, so didn't suffer from the overhead heat. Pork satay was spicy and peanutty, but the crispy chilli beef was again dry and er.. very crispy. The beef in black bean had a curious synthetic taste that I couldn't put my finger on and was packed with pepper, it was too fiery for me. Bec's chicken in cashew nuts was accompanied by over cooked (or over waited) noodles and in the end we gave up.
A quick visit to the sweet trolley to select something to get rid of the lingering pepper taste in my mouth, revealed a selection of cakes and gateaus that looked liked they'd been attacked by a bunch of kids with machete's.
The manager duly asked if we'd enjoyed our meal, but we hadn't and he was forced to endure our displeasure. But to give him his dues he deducted one meal from the bill and he was keen to point out that when the the restaurant was full, the food turn around was considerably quicker, so if I was to return, I'd ensure it was on the busier Friday or Saturday nights.
It's such a crying shame that the no-better-than-average food, doesn't live upto the slick interior and lifestyle it portrays. It will be interesting to see what happens when Wokmania opens in the coming weeks.
Food 3/10
Service 5/10
Venue 6/10

Friday 11th July 2008, GOJI HAS NOW CLOSED DOWN

Tel: 01332 363900


http://www.lifeatgoji.com/

Zest, 16 George Street, Derby, DE1 1EH

Click to enlarge

Zest is like Scotland to me. I know it's there, I really want to go, but I never get round to it. Well sister and myself have booked a flight in mothers 'Rover 200' to Zest this evening. At last we're going!

It must be a couple of years since local restauranteur Bill Poynton relinquished the reigns at Zest, giving the new owners plenty of time to stamp their own mark on the place. I must say I do prefer the new aubergine colour scheme to the previous stark white interior, the 'cosy control' has been turned up a notch or two. It certainly needed it this evening as the relentless winter downpours continue (whatever happened to snow?).
We were lucky they still had tables on the ground floor. I prefer this to the balcony. Various drinks and a dish of herby olives were ordered. We were preparing for take off....
As usual mother by passed starters leaving it to sister et moi to sample the openers. Intrigue lured me towards the cod, spinach & mascarpone wellington (£5.95) and sister commenced with butternut squash & ginger soup (£5.25). The ubiquitous butternut squash soup was as you'd expect, but with a hint of ginger and star anise. I do wish restaurants would "step out of the box" when it comes to winter soups. I'm getting quite bored of butternut squash. The cod wellington was a sausage shaped filo parcel containing steamed spinach and a thumb sized piece of cod, sat on a pool of tangy orange hollandaise. It was light and felt healthful, with most of the flavours packed into the sauce. We were in full flight....

For the main event mother went for pork tenderloin with caramelised pears & brandy sauce (£15.25). It was cooked just right and served on a bed of potato with a cluster of pan fried pear slices forming a perfect peak. My sister ordered the saute of chicken breast with apples and parsnip(£14.95), her accompanying brandy & madeira sauce imparting most of the flavours in this delicate, yet once again perfectly cooked dish. It was no surprise I chose the most expensive main course, venison steak with rosemary and cherries (£18.50), came perfectly seared pink and succulent on the inside. The astute combination of rosemary and cherries creating a perfect winter dish. The accompanying selection of winter brassicas were also cooked spot on.

For a dessert I had their panettone bread & butter pudding (£5.25), it was a lucious slice of gooey, squidgy pudding with plenty of sticky butterscotch sauce. I loved it. Mother surprisingly had room for a banana mousse (£5.25), a light mouse with slices of banana and more of their finger lickin butterscotch sauce, a well executed take on a banana split.

It had been an enjoyable flight....

Zest provides comfortable, contemporary dinning without getting too involved in "foodie fashion". You won't find snail porridge or essence of quail with a lagoustine foam here, just modern, stylish dinning. Book early for valentines!

Food 7.5/10

Service 6.5/10

Venue 7/10

Tel: 01332 381101

http://www.restaurantzest.com/

"Now I gotta reason, Now I gotta reason and I'm still waiting" (Holidays In The Sun, Sex Pistols, 1977)

The Bridge Inn, Chester Green, Derby, DE1 3QY

Now if I mention the Bridge Inn at Chester Green, it will probably conjure up images of deep fried food and two meals for £5 before 7.30pm, etc. But I can assure that John Palmer (previously at Soul on Green Lane) has been creating something considerably better than that here for the last year or so, I just can't believe I've not picked it up on my radar before.

The first floor dinning room is in complete contrast to the rest of the pub which is tonight predominately guys drinking Carling and watching the match on Sky. Their rapturous cheer drifting up the stairs, ensures the large room is given a bit of atmosphere. I was really impressed with the room, the low ceiling made it feel like we were on the set of "Death on the Nile", extremely warm considering the elements outside ravaging against the windows. I imagine it must be very pleasant in the summer, with views over the river Derwent from the abundance of windows.

There was a compact Specials menu and we all ordered from this apart from the Mother. It was Mussels in chorizo tomato sauce with french bread (£3.95) to start me off and my sister had a pop at the Arnold Bennett omlette (£3.95). A bowl full of mussels with a rich tomato, roasted pepper and chorizo sauce came with bread and fries. It was a meal in itself. My sisters omlette Arnold Bennett ( a famous classic, created so the story goes, by head chef at the Savoy hotel, for the novelist Arnold Bennett, who wrote an entire novel, Imperial Palace, while staying there) was perfectly cooked, firm on the outside with chunks of smokey fish inside an light, fluffy interior. Both were more "light bites" than starters, extremely satisfying.

Mains duly arrived. Mother had the battered cod, chunky chips and peas pudding (£5.95). She loved the home made chunky tartar sauce which had the addition of tarragon. For yours truly it was the pheasant breast with a bacon & cabbage potato cake and shalot & port sauce (£6.95). Absolutely top drawer. Locally shot pheasant with two rustic potato cakes in a rich, zingy sauce, perfect for a winters evening. Sister had their popular braised steak with wild mushrooms and herb lyonaise potato's. Two chunks of slow cooked, melt-in-the-mouth steak with a separate bowl of thinly sliced, layered herby potato's. Everyone took time between mouthfulls to murmur "fantastic", "what great value", "We'll be back here again soon"and "I can't believe it's not packed?".

I have to say it was extremely good, the prices were pretty keen and the quality of the food served up could have warranted considerably more. Freshly cooked, contemporary pub food in a very pleasant environment at outstandingly great prices. This really was Decent Grub.
After the meal John popped up for a chat and told us that all the food was locally sourced, ice creams and breads home made. I can't speak highly enough of the place. The only down side is that chefs can move from place to place quicker than managers at Newcastle United.

John...........the Bridge Inn and Derby, needs you!

Food 8/10

Service 7/10

Venue 7.5/10

Tel: 01332 371360

"We'll do the twist, the stomp, the mashed potato too. Any old dance that you wanna do" (Let's Dance, The Ramones, 1976)

Emilys Steakhouse, 24 Monk Street, Derby DE22 3QB

What do we expect when looking for somewhere to eat? Good food (obviously), relaxing environment (or lively depending on what you fancy), clean (er... definitely), appropriate service (hopefully) and of course, right money. Well Emily's Steakhouse fell short on most of these. I can't believe I'd been recommended this by the same person that introduced me to Ebi Sushi, which is coincidentally over the road.
We were the only dinners, which is probably why the proprietor was keen to show us some pictures on her digi camera, of some customers she'd had in earlier, yeah right....
Drawn by the bright lights, we'd popped in on this chilli evening only to be met by an interior too brightly lit a dirty floor and a disappointingly cold atmosphere. It didn't bode well. It was therefore no suprise, that Emily herself, made a point of telling us "tis 21 deglees in here tonight". Is it now, feels bloody colder than that! You really need to do something special or different (Ebi obviously scores on both of these) if you're to make a go of a restaurant in this neon lit, kebab dominated part of Derby.

No starter but a sirloin steak and chips for Bec (£12.99) liver, onions and mash (£9.99) for me. It was all too "Berni Inn, circa 1970". A tough steak for Bec, cooked rarer than she'd asked for. They forgot her pepper sauce, so were were forced to wait 5 minutes before tucking in. My god we're the only two people in here and there's 3 staff, how can that be? My liver and onions was again too 'pub chain' for my liking, over cooked liver and school dinner gravy. At £26 for the two meals and a drink, we'd have been better off at Pizza Express.
Remember the slogan......"You're better off at a Berni"
We'll if they were still around, we certainly would have been.
Food 3/10
Service 4/10
Venue 3/10
Tel: 01332 368863

"What the hell is wrong with you, What the hell you going to do" (Nasty, Nasty, 999, 1977)

The Black Swan, 44 Market Place, Belper, Derbyshire, DE1 1FZ.

I believe that Belper is a town going somewhere. An award winning independent cinema, where you can have a bottle of wine whilst watching a movie, an Aladdin's Cave of a deli, a well attended farmers market and several new eateries including the recently re-furbished Black Swan in the Market Place, not to be confused with the Black Swan at Idridgehay (which is also near Belper).

It's a Tuesday,

We don't want to cook,

We don't want to go far,

We want "decent midweek grub!". Let's go........

There are three concepts on the go here: formal dinning downstairs, pub food in the bar or wait for it..... tapas in the bar too! We gotta try that.

Not just Spanish dishes on offer here (in fact most aren't Spanish) but various plates of noshable goodies and morsels from around the globe. We asked for some marinated olives (£2.00) to soak up our two pints of Carling, the other half wasn't keep on the strong cumin flavour, not what I would have expected either, but for two quid, who's complaining.

To share we chose a portion of kofte kebab (£3.50), regular nachos (£3.95), spicy potatoes (£3.00) and hallouimi with sweet chilli sauce (£3.50). If you look at that again, we've got middle east (kebabs), Mexico (nachos), Turkish/Greek (halloumi), far east (sweet chilli sauce) and the spicy potatoes can be anywhere you bloody want them to be!

The kebabs were three lamb skewers served with a chunky glass of tzatziki, they got polished off immediately. The unusual mix off halloumi with sweet chilli sauce actually worked quite well. Thick slices of deep fried "sweeky" halloumi with a glass of sweet chilli sauce, again all gone. The spicy potatoes weren't saying much and the landlord agreed with me when he collected the plates. Why serve it then ???!!!! However the large bowl of nachos we shared was top drawer. No tortilla chips or Doritos here (honestly I've had cheesy Doritos in a nachos before!) but proper large flour tortillas, deep fried and served with a generous blob of salsa, sour cream and guacamole. I'd have that again ( and I did the next day, but regretably we were told they'd ran out of guacamole, how frustrating).

It was fair to middle and I'd have another go some time, however I'd like to hear from any one that's been to their restaurant. Considering it was just over twenty smackers including a couple of pints, it was a bargain.

Food 5.5/10

Service 6/10

Venue 5/10

Tel: 01773 823000

"Let's wait for the blackout, The light is too bright, Let's wait for the blackout, Wait for the night" (Wait for the Blackout, The Damned, 1982)

The Mill Wheel, Hartshorne, Derbyshire, DE11 7AS

The short listed entries for the sixth Derbyshire Food and Drink Awards, organised by Derbyshire County Council, were announced a couple of weeks ago. I'd hoped to try and drop in on a few of the venues before the winners are announced on Thursday 25th October.
However time has slipped by and it now looks like The Mill Wheel at Hartshorne(*), shortlisted for Pub/Bistro of the year 2007, is going to be the only establishment I'm going to have time to grace between now and the 25th. At last we're gona get a decent Sunday lunch!

So it's off for a jaunt down windy country lanes with mother and Bec (a tip: don't sit in the back when you go via the Repton route. The constantly winding roads nearly caused me to be re-introduced to my breakfast!)
The Mill Wheel is a delightfull building, with a dramatic 24ft diameter water wheel dating back to the 18th century, greeting you as you walk in. Pretty impressive. However faux pas number 1 happened within a minute of arrival. There was no record of the booking I'd made the previous day, luckily they had a spare table in the dining room. We order a round of drinks. Just a soft drink for me, my stomach still thinks we're at Alton Towers. The downstairs bar area was extremely homely, a real fire and several sofas ensured maximum 'relax' factor. The 1st floor dining room regretably didn't have the same feel. Despite the original old beams, the large rectangular room felt more canteen than cosy. It oozed busy, industrious and slightly disorganised. Nevertheless our window table did ensure a lovely view of sunny autumnal fields.

Menus printed of sheets of A4 paper were thrust upon us, why they don't print a pile of menus and give every diner a fresh one, rather than a slightly crumpled one with a gravy stain in the corner, I'll never know. The cost is negligible, but the appearance is so much sharper. The table also felt a bit disorganised, with a tired single artificial lilly in a not-too-clean glass vase.
The starters were upon us. Chicken liver pate for Bec (£4.50) and ham hock terrine for myself. Both were accompanied by onion marmalade. They'd obviously made too much! The plates were well presented, clean in appearance and with just enough peppery rocket salad to accompany.
A large queen wasp circling our table kept us entertained until the main course. First I felt queezy, now I felt uneezy. Will I ever settle? Roast top side of beef for me (£8.95), roast leg of pork for mother (£7.95) and roast leg of lamb for Bec (£9.95) and two dishes of veg to share, the usual new potatoes, carrots & cauliflower. Three oversights then occured in quick succession. The second round of drinks never arrived, the requested horseradish and mint sauce didn't either and there was what I could only describe as a blighted spud amongst my veg, uuuurgh.
My accompanying Yorkshire pudding, had the texture of.......yes pudding. The oven & cooking oil obviously weren't hot enough when it went in. Everything screams "we can't cope".
My beef was also overdone for my liking, and I certainly wasn't given a choice. However all the meat was tender and we certainly weren't going to leave any behind.
When asked "was your meal ok?", I had to say "sorry it wasn't". They did what they only could and knocked off the price of one main. I got the impression they were short staffed and over booked today.
To be honest I was quite shocked that this is supposed to be in Derbyshire's top 5 pub/bistros. I just hope for their sake that the judges visited on a worthier day.
As we left the carpark I urged Bec to go back via the main road. I don't think my stomach can go through that again!

(*) For reference, the others in this category are:

Bluebell Inn, Farnah Green
The Chequers Inn, Froggatt Edge
The Holly Bush, Church Broughton
The Devonshire Arms, Beeley (Winner: Derbyshire dinning pub of the year , 2007)

Food 5/10
Venue 6/10
Service 5/10
Tel: 01283 550335

www.themillwheel.co.uk

"I`m sick to death of everything you do. And if I’m gonna have a puke, you bet yer life I’ll puke on you. I’m gonna be, gonna be sick on you" (Sick On You, The Boys, 1977)

Thai Boran, 56 Green Lane, Derby, DE1 1RP

Yet another thai restaurant, is indicative of the cuisine types available in Derby (there's a further two thai/oriental openings planned for this month alone). A vast selection of Indian & oriental restaurants, but still no decent "pub grub" within the city centre. What I'd give for a plate of piping hot smooth buttery mash and some locally produced herby sausages and ladle of rich fruity onion gravy (decent grub)........don't get me going!

Having stayed late at my shop one Monday evening, staining one of the floors. I was ready for a beer and a quick food fix. We were just about to snap the final lock shut when a couple of friends waltzed by, en route to Thai Boran. We didn't need to be asked twice.......in fact we didn't need to be asked. We were coming!
I've always prided myself on knowing most eateries within the city centre, but Thai Boran on Green Lane, was new to me. I hadn't ventured this far up Green Lane since Alf James closed down (how I used to think it was cool to walk around Derby with one of those fake cigarettes, puffing out clouds of talcum powder!).

The Tardis size interior revealed a cluster of rooms, filled with the habitual large wood carved elephants and scenes of Thailand. A table in the main auditorium was selected by your now extremely hungry stain (floor) covered host.

Thai beers already in place, and several bowls of fiery prawn crackers later, it was the Toong Thong (isn't that what Betty Boop wears?) that arrived first (£3.99). A brass stand topped with half a dozen crispy wonton parcels, filled with minced prawn & chicken and a sweet chilli dipping sauce, was equally shared between me and Bec. Charlie Dimmock would have been proud of the accompanying floral arrangement, carefully carved from large oriental radishes and dipped in the chilli sauce, they also tasted half decent.

The extremely nervous waiter swapped our empty beer bottles for full ones and removed the rest of the flower arrangement, ensuring he kept everything at arms length (does he think I've put one of Alf James's exploding detonators in the food remnants?!)

The main event for me was Gai Yang Phoo Khao Fai (or chargrilled chicken) £7.49 and Pad Num Mun Hoi £6.79, for the Bec. Once more served up by the apprehensive looking waiter. I reckon he'd recently been reading the Firework Code. "No 4: Light the firework at arm's length, and stand well back!" I couldn't get over his unusual body language.

The chefs artistic talents had again been put to full use, with my chicken dish served up sizzling in a cleverly created tin foil chicken. It was a perfect combination of thai herbs and grilled chicken, hot, sweet and garlicky. I forgot to order rice but as usual there's always plenty of it kicking around, so I pilfered some of our companions steamed jasmine rice to absorb any remaining juices in the base of my foil bird. Bootiful! Bec's dish was her favourite combination of chicken and mushroom. Well presented again, but padded out with a few too many peppers for her liking.

All in all it was a really good discovery. If we hadn't polished off about 5 beers each the bill would have been around £20-£25, for one starter to share and a couple of mains and drinks.

I do like Thai, but let's hope that sooner than later, someone sees an opening for something different within the city centre. We shouldn't be forced to flee the city in an attempt to find some decent grub, no wonder Pizza Express and Zizzi are always busy.

Food 7/10

Service 6/10

Venue 5/10 (the toilets let it down abit)

Tel: 01332 343933

"Eighties - I'm living in the eighties, Eighties - I have to push, I have to struggle, Eighties" (Eighties, Killing Joke, 1984)

Martin, September, 2007

The Thai Kitchen, 3 Wilne Lane, Shardlow, DE72 2HA

The new Alvaston Bypass can now propel you from Derby to Shardlow in minutes, so mother, sister et moi hit the gas and 10 minutes later we're pulling up outside the old Lady in Grey hotel. Dark and derelict from the outside, the entrance reveals a 'Narnia' esk junk shop interior with old tables, carvings and various brik-a-brak squeezed into every nook and cranny.
Considering it's August, the room felt surprisingly cold (mind you, hasn't this summer been the worst you can remember!?). Then as if by magic the heating suddenly came to life. Things are gonna start warming up!

The constantly bowing waitress took our order, nothing for the mother but Tempura Squid (£4.95) for me. Lightly battered, soft fleshed hoops of yummy squid with a choice of three dipping sauces, thai-riffic! Sis had a bash at the Thai Mixed starter (£5.45), a platter of various deep fried morsels and the ubiquitous ornate radish carving (are you supposed to eat this?).
The bowing waitress removed our plates and returned with the three mains. Mother had ordered Pad Prio Wan Gai (£7.15), a modern take on Sweet & Sour Chicken, a bit too sweet for her palate she proclaimed, but it still kept her quiet for some time. I ordered Gai Pad Med Ma-Muang (£7.65). I was intrigued by the description's foot notes proclaiming that this is Andy Roddick's favourite dish (world no.2 tennis player, in case you didn't know). I'd never have guessed he lived in Alvaston!. A classic thai combination of chicken, cashew nuts & chillies was accompanied by a bowl of sticky rice. A bit too fiery for me considering it only had a 1 out of 5 heat rating. Sister ordered Pad Gra Praw Gai hor Kai (I assure you these are the genuine names!) at £8.25 it was the most expensive, and also the most disappointing. The stir fried chicken with holy basil in an omlette, came....without the omlette wrap, resulting in an expensive plate of stir fried chicken & mushrooms. "So solly, fort yoo ask foor diflent dish". Well they never charged for it, which in my opinion is the only thing a restaurant should do in these circumstances. I'm still amazed how a kitchen that isn't busy, get such basic things wrong.

The eclectic interior is fun, but I do draw the line at the amount of cobwebs. I know it adds to the C.S. Lewis experience, but I don't think stir fried chicken with sweet & sour spider would go down well with most people.
Worth a look, but don't go in your Armarni suit or Jimmy Choo's!
Food 5/10
Service 6/10
Venue 6/10 (or 2/10 if you don't like spiders or cobwebs)
Tel: 01332 793311

"Don't tread on an ant he's done nothing to you, there might come a day, when he's treading on you" (Ant Music, Adam & The Ants, 1980)

Martin, August 2007

Unfortunately, despite the fact I thought this was a fun place and the food was acceptable, some friends visited last month and told me the food was very poor, and the restaurant was cold. Probably best avoided.

Martin, February 2009

Graze, 11-12 Friargate, Derby

Well at last, a brand new independent restaurant opening in Derby. This is exactly what local enthusiasts of "something that's half decent to eat, but isn't a chain" have been waiting for! The dark Bat Cave interior had intrigued me since the day it opened and now they've had enough time to correct any initial blips (I believe they had more than their fair share), it's time to don our miners helmet lamps and take the plunge.
It really is dark in here, not only are the walls, furniture, lights, etc all black, but the menu was pretty difficult to read being printed in black on dark grey paper.
The maitre 'de promptly turned up in his dark Gothan City suit, inappropriately smeared and stained in places. Maybe he's secretly attempting to paint one of the rooms white, in between his front of house duties.
An order for the Potted Atlantic Prawns (£5.75) and Smoked Mackerel Tian (£5.50) was placed along with a Crispy Belly Pork (£10.95) and a Poached Fried Chicken Roulade (£11.95) logged for mains. When enquiring if we'd need to order any accompaniments, extra chips were promptly offered by the man in black. Not a good sign.
G&T and Vodka & tonic were duly delivered. Hang on a minute, that's lemonade not tonic. Here we go .....
Once the transformation from humans to foxes was complete, I scanned round the room with my new ability to see in the dark and was taken aback by the sheer size of the place. My hearing must have also become more acute (bat like) as I was suddenly aware of the sheer volume in here. Several long tables towards the back of the room with large parties on them obviously made up the bulk of the volume. Hen do's or birthday's no doubt.
The starters came with suspicious lightening speed. My Potted Prawns wrapped in smoked salmon, were very chilled, they'd either been de-frosted or just taken out of a very cold fridge? Characterless in taste and texture, as was the thick wedge of foccacia, very "Morrisons bakery". The Mackerel tian was...... you guessed it, Mackrel pate. Bog standard stuff. Both dishes were displayed on large irregular shaped plates, massively over presented. All dressed up, with nowhere to go!
Within minutes our plates had been whisked away and we were presented with the main attraction on two more large inappropriate "OH, don't they look trendy" plates.
Tell me if I'm crazy but Crispy Belly Pork, needs to be crispy. Yes, you guessed it, it wasn't. A thick slice of wobbly pork isn't top of my list. The twice cooked chicken roulade wasn't saying much either, chunky chips, spinach and an alleged thyme jus were sharing the plate.
The speedy service, bland over presented food served to at least 100 covers at a time, made me think........ Could this be the new Antibo's?
Fine dining it certainly isn't.
Unfortunately this place is all show, at medium dough, for people "not in the know"!
No doubt you'll be invited to Karen's 21st birthday here, you'll see what I mean.......
Food 5/10
Venue 6/10
Service 4/10
Tel: 01332 208262

www.timetograze.com

"In darkness there is no sin, Light only brings the fear, Nothing to corrupt the eyes, There is no vision here" (Wait for the Blackout, The Damned 1980)

Martin (sometime in July, it wasn't that memorable)

The Red Lion, Hollington, Derby

It was only a matter of time before my culinary journey around Derby ended up at the Red Lion in Hollington, situated off the main A52 Derby to Ashbourne road. It's become widely recognised as one of the best pub's for food in the area, it's just a shame that it's a little bit too far for that impromptu mid-week jaunt (especially if you fancy a beer or a glass of wine).
Here to celebrate my son's 20th birthday (even though he never made it. He shot off to Blackpool last minute. Obviously preferring humdrum food to freshly drummed-up food!). Ah well, three's company, four's more expensive!
Two dining areas to choose from. The recent extension is the slightly more formal dining area, whilst the cosy bar offers the same menu.
The three remaining members of the birthday party plonked themselves in the bar, slap bang in from of the large chalk board menu.
I was the only one to take on a starter. Goats cheese on toast with a beetroot glaze (£5.65) was an attractive plate with a decorative squiggle of beetroot glaze. Very yummy, but there wasn't enough of the sweet and tangy beetroot glaze to cut through the goats cheese. I needed more!
Mother never does starters, so went straight for the lamb & mint pie with chips and peas (£8.25), a hearty dish, piping hot with plenty of chunky chips. No complaints, but I did think it was more of a winter dish than high summer. Bec had her favourite, the rack of lamb with garlic & rosemary jus (£15.95). A bit pricey in my opinion, it turned up pink, juicy, well presented and piping hot. I'd got an appetite so went for the fresh fish and chips with peas (£8.95). The large piece of crispy fish was struggling to fit on the plate. It was hot, fresh and extremely filling. I was beat!
It easy to see why this place has won various eating awards (even though it's not received an accolade for a couple of years now). This is top pub grub. Slightly pricey in parts, but quality does come with a price.
I couldn't help wondering if Daniel's fish & chips in Blackpool would be as good as mine........wake up Martin!!
The Red Lion. Sometimes hard to find, but invariably worth it.
Food 7/10
Service 6/10
Venue 7/10
Tel: 01335 360241

"My father when I was younger, Took me up to the hill, That I looked down on to the city smog, Above the factory spill, He said this is where I come, When I want to be free, Well he never was in his lifetime, But these words stuck with me" (One Way of Life, The Levellers, 1992)

www.redlionhollington.co.uk

Martin, Tuesday 3rd July 2007 (my son's birthday)

Ruskins, Derby Road, Melbourne, Derbys

Ruskins wins "Plain English Award" for it's menu, 3rd year in a row!

(click to enlarge)

I'm sorry, but Friday night is lads night. After a long stressful week at work, there's nothing I need more than a few pints O foamin ale! But when I get a call at 5 0'clock asking would I like to make up the numbers at Ruskins in Melbourne (super sub!) for Dave's birthday, I jump at the chance, and my better half is more than happy.
He's hired the whole place, all 24 seats of this cosy single room restaurant. It's the 1st time in years I've been to an un-licenced restaurant, so a quick jaunt to the Offy for some bottles of our favourite tipple, was pulled-in before our lift arrived.
30 minutes later we're in Melbourne, a village (or is it a town?) with more than it's fair share of quality eateries, most of them congregated around the busy Derby Road. At first glance Ruskins appears to be a house, until I recognised some of the reprobates gathered outside, we'd found it!

Someone with a bit more notice than us had had brought with them, a plastic barrel of the beloved Pedigree Bitter (they probably installed it the previous day, that's planning!). Pint in hand we proceeded to play musical chairs, until everyone was happy with the seating arrangements.

Copies of the extremely difficult to read hand written menu were strewn around the two tables. Unless I'm mistaken, I ordered Scallops wrapped in pancetta, with courgette and scallop fritters, for Bec it was to be large field mushrooms stuffed with spinach, garlic and a type of cheese that we still haven't been able to deduce from this poorly written menu (see above). My scallops were cooked just right and tightly wrapped in salty slivers of bacon, er sorry pancetta, with plenty of leaves and a tangy hollandaise sauce, very bistro style. Bec's plate was also adorned with a heap of leaves, topped with the large mushrooms, still firm yet cooked and oozing with the garlic, spinach and the unknown cheese. Finger lickin good.

Main course I opted for fillet steak, requested rare it came slightly overcooked for me, but with a superb light wild mushroom cream sauce. Bec had the rack of lamb, cooked just right (slightly pink) served with a wine and mint sauce and seasonal broad beans. We both eagerly polished off our plates of food.

To date service had been pretty slow, but to be fair they were trying to serve all 24 guests at once from the tiny en suite kitchen, subsequently we both still felt there was room for a pudd. I'm impressed at the large selection, 12 in total, and all my favourites creme brullé, sticky toffee pudding, baked cheesecake, almond tart, etc, etc. Well I have a confession now, due to the fact that the table was adorned with various bottles of wine, I must have had two glasses on the go! and several pedigree's have been forced down my neck. A week later I can't remember what I chose. I know, I know, bloody ridiculous, but I can tell you that I do recall clearing the plate, so I can safely say, "it was good".

I start to hear words like "taxi" and "how long", next I know we're evicted onto the street. We then proceeded to wait at least an hour before a taxi came to pick us up, by which time I was soaked, tired and wobbling like a jelly at a kids birthday party.

At £30 for three corses, I reckon it's good value, however Dave sprung the entire bill. Top night Dave, thanks!

Ruskins was a little gem, but take it easy on the drinks and definately pre-book your taxi. Hic.
Food 7/10

Service 5/10
Venue 6/10

Tel: 01332 864170

"There were times, I´m sure you knew. When there was f**k, f**k f**k-all else to do" (My Way, Sid Vicious, 1978)

Martin, Friday 15th June 2007